“As the deer longs for streams of water, so I long for you, O God. I thirst for God, the living God. When can I go and stand before him?” Psalm 42:1-2 (NLT)

Have you ever gotten to a place in your relationship with God where your feel like everything has come to a standstill and God says one of your least favorite words -“WAIT?” Like seriously, you ever been in a hard place. A place so cloudy that you just can’t see your way out. It’s like, I know I’m good because I am where God would have me to be. Yet it’s still uneasy because there is so much uncertainty. When you’re in that place will you choose fear or faith?

I’m in that hard place right now, with cloudy vision, and I have been for over 6 months. I feel stretched beyond capacity and I can’t even tell you where the first half of my year has gone. Yet, I am choosing faith and I must choose faith daily. I cannot see what’s ahead and don’t understand what’s happening in my circumstances. However, I continue to press forward on this journey with Jesus. I believe it was the Apostle Paul that wrote these encouraging words from a prison cell:

“Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 3:13-14 (KJV)

I don’t fully comprehend the weight of Paul’s words and I am not sure I will ever be able to. I’m still learning how this faith thing works. I am still learning what it means to have a genuine relationship with Jesus Christ as opposed to being religious. I am still learning what it means to fight from victory as oppose to fighting for victory. There are so many things I don’t understand, and I’ve been through so much but I choose you Jesus. “Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him: but I will maintain mine own ways before him.” Job 13:15 (KJV)

I refuse to look at my circumstances or my life and feel sorry for myself. Everyday is a blessing. Also, I know there are so many people in the world who are in worse predicaments. So every single day, I encourage myself with the Word of the Lord. I am a prisoner of hope, holding on to the promises that God will give me double for my trouble and the oil of joy instead of mourning. Isaiah 61:3 and Zechariah 9:12 (NIV)

I dare you to do the same! I dare you to speak life over your situation. I dare you to trust God in the mist of it all. Don’t look at your circumstances look at your God. Remember the story in the Bible where Peter took his eyes off Jesus and almost sank?

Jesus Walks on Water – Matthew 14:24-33 (NLT)

“The disciples were in trouble far away from land, for a strong wind had risen, and they were fighting heavy waves. About three o’clock in the morning Jesus came toward them, walking on the water. When the disciples saw him walking on the water, they were terrified. In their fear, they cried out, “It’s a ghost!”

But Jesus spoke to them at once. “Don’t be afraid,” he said. “Take courage. I am here! Then Peter called to him, “Lord, if it’s really you, tell me to come to you, walking on the water.” “Yes, come,” Jesus said. So Peter went over the side of the boat and walked on the water toward Jesus. But when he saw the strong wind and the waves, he was terrified and began to sink. “Save me, Lord!” he shouted.

Jesus immediately reached out and grabbed him. “You have so little faith,” Jesus said. “Why did you doubt me?” When they climbed back into the boat, the wind stopped. Then the disciples worshiped him. “You really are the Son of God!” they exclaimed.”

Please, keep your eyes on Jesus! Listen to me! I AM HERE TO SPEAK TO THE BROKEN HEARTED! I pray that you will trust the lover of your soul. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.” Proverbs 3:5-6 (NLT)

I am speaking from a cloudy place. 

You may say sis you don’t understand but I do I’ve seen so many things you wouldn’t believe and even got caught in the cross fire a few times. But God kept me. I’ve been violated on my soul, but God kept me. I’ve been abandoned and rejected, but God kept me. If I can make it out of my circumstances so can you.

Honestly, part of the reason I can’t imagine what God will do next is because I would have never expected to be where I am today. I attended Chicago Public Schools in neighborhoods where some people told us we would be nothing more than statistics. Thank God for the good people at those schools that encouraged us.

Listen to me, you are going to make it on the other side of this. If your vision is cloudy, I dare you to trust God. No matter what your circumstances are if you keep your eyes on Jesus you will make it. Jesus is enough! Keep your faith! Pass this test! You’re going to come out on the other side of this, you’re not going to die here. You are going to get through this!

The Word: “As the deer longs for streams of water, so I long for you, O God. I thirst for God, the living God. When can I go and stand before him?” Psalm 42:1-2 (NLT)

The Story/The Lesson: Is anybody else being tested? I am standing at a fork in the road. I am in a cloudy place. Yet every day, I must choose faith over fear. No longer allowing my circumstances to deceive me and refusing to feed into the lies of the enemy. I’m tryna stir up your faith! Be encouraged! I don’t care what the report says. Most importantly, get vulnerable with God … tell Him how you feel…. if anyone understands….He does… stir up your Faith and keep your eyes on Jesus.

Bonus: Sometimes you have to encourage yourself, here is some good worship to help you encourage yourself in the Lord – Donald Lawrence & The Tri-City Singers – Encourage Yourself

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